Darkly Dreaming Dexter (2004) Jeff Lindsay

After watching several episodes of Dexter - starring Michael C. Hall - I decided I wanted to read the book that the series was initially based on. I eventually found a copy while wandering around the Hastings in Nacogdoches.

If you're not familiar with the show then I whole heartedly recommend watching it. CBS is showing it as part of their Sunday night programming. Basically the premise is that Dexter is a serial killer who works as a blood splatter expert for the Miami PD. His victims are only other serial killers or just plain bad folks. There's a great deal of humorous internal dialogue as he pretends to be a regular citizen. I like the side characters and am beginning to actually be interested in their stories. It's a good show.

The first Dexter novel - Darkly Dreaming Dexter - is not a bad crime novel. It's not a bad serial killer novel. The writing has a rapid fire pace that I appreciate. It's set in Miami and I get the feeling that if I was from Miami I recognize streets and places and the general feel of the place. Most of the events in this book I recognized from the first season I have watched so it wasn't very surprising. I pretty much enjoyed the book until the last quarter. I even read the last two chapter twices thinking that I missed something. Maybe I did because man, what a stupid cock-a-mamie ending. After I finished it I said, "Really?" I had to wonder if he actually had a good ending and his publisher made him change it. When "the twist" arrives you can almost hear the dun dun dun. I beat M. Night Shamalyan thought it was brilliant.

I hope the show doesn't continue to follow the book. If it this ends like Darkly Dreaming Dexter I won't be able to continue watching it.

For you DS owning Guitar Hero fans...

Yes. It is real. Guitar Hero: On Tour will be coming out this summer. Here's a video. Keep your hand out of your pants.

Thor's Hammer entire store up for grabs?

Apparently Thor's Hammer went under and the entire stock is up on the auction block. Here's the ad on craigslist.

Yet another Dune remake and more!

Saw on Variety that there's going to another Dune adaptation in the works. This one will be directed by Peter Berg (The Kingdom). Apparently the producer just got rights to the story and they are looking for a writer. I guess that's cool but I have to wonder who's going to be in it. I predict Shia The Beef will be Paul Atredies. You heard it here first. 2:1.

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On the right is one of the music players from GTA IV. Looks like this particular world/funk station is being hosted by Femi Kuti. All signs point to the fact that this game is going to be more awesome than...well anything.

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Well I didn't know that the terms bobbie and peeler (both British terms for police) originated from the name of British Home Secretary Robert Peel. Robert Peel was instrumental in helping Parliament create the London Metropolitan Police Act in 1829. Now the line, "He's a Peeler 716 come to arrest the Zulu." makes much more sense.

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Why are people so surprised when I know off the top of my head wether or not we have a book in stock? I only look at the fucking things day in and day out for months on end. If there was anything interesting or good in stock I'd know about it - and it probably wouldn't be out on the shelves for people to get all grubby. Perhaps people doubt my cognitive abilities because of the dunce cap and rope of drool hanging from my lip.

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More shouting and jumping up and down to be continued. Stay tuned.

The Strangers (May 2008) - Trailer

The Strangers - Official Trailer.
Uploaded by LivGirl47

Bully: Scholarship Edition (2008)

Rockstar blah blah blah fanboy blah blah blah. Bully blah blah blah fanboy blah blah blah w00t! Haven't tried the multiplayer blah blah blah.

Pick this up because GTA IV doesn't come out for another month. It's actually a really fun (and funny) game - despite the freezes a.k.a. "technical issues". Just save often and restart if there's a freeze up. It doesn't happen very often.

10,000 B.C. (2008) dir. Roland Emmerich

I wouldn't have wanted to see this movie except for the fact that I love insane prehistory tales, weird adventure tales, and ripping yarns. Historically inaccurate? Hey egghead go back to your learn-a-terium. What kicks more ass? Cavemen digging around in their own filth or cavemen being enslaved and using mammoths to build pyramids? If I wanted science and crap I'd watch National Geographic.

10, 000 B.C. is pulp. Pure, stupid, stare slack jawed at the moving pictures, "Oh, what the hell." fun. Does it suck? Yes. Is it awesome? Yes. It's the kind of movie you go see when you visit the family. We saw it on vacation at the only theater in Nacogdoches, TX. Frankly I think the best way to have seen 10,000 B.C. would be at a drive-in theater. Plus if it had been rated R it could have been totally awesome - as is it lacks both nudity and gore.

If you've seen the preview you know what you're getting. This ain't Chekov but it doesn't need to be. I think part of the reason I like the movie so much is because I am imagining Roland Emmerich talking people into making the movie. Sitting around with his producers and saying, "You know, I've always wanted to make a prehistoric movie." It makes me laugh thinking of the pitch and people working on the movie having a good time and saying, "ROFL, we're making a caveman movie!"

Another plug for Chromehounds and assorted minor items.

I am going to plug Chromehounds again because I am addicted to it - like a fat kid loves cake. I've actually started watching videos of 'Hound builds and combat. It's a good thing I have an understanding woman because I would never get one - this game is one the verge of preventing me from sleeping or leaving the house.

I did pick up a copy of Bully: Scholarship Edition for the 360. I couldn't help it. The previous incarnation for the PS2 was a solid and fun Rockstar outing. This edition is more of the same plus some new additions. A review will be upcoming.

In other news...well...there isn't really any other news. Hope you guys are doing well.

Diary of the Dead (2008) dir. George A Romero

"When there's no more room in Hell the dead will blog."

That's kind of how Diary of the Dead felt. The movie wasn't bad - it was better than Land of the Dead - but in no way was it even remotely close to the original. If you've seen the rest of Romero's zombie movies you know what you are getting: paint by number zombies, some gore - though this one was a lot less gory than I was hoping for, a touch of humor, and heavy handed social commentary. Pretty much you are either going to see this movie or you're not.

The basic idea is that some film students are out filming when the zom-pacalypse breaks out. Most of the movie is shot from a docu-aspect with the maker keeping the camera stuck to his face even when zombies are attacking his friends in front of him. He keeps filming because "people have to know the truth". Film maker, assorted fellow students, and drunken Professor drive around Pennsylvania filming the truth, dispatching zombies, and checking in on relatives. When I think about it Diary of the Dead is pretty paint by numbers. The heavy handed social commentary consists of the Government/Media lying to us, Homeland Security being a joke, if the way humanity treats itself when the chips are down (terrible) is humanity really worth saving (I don't need a zom-pacalypse to answer that), and it's up to the digital culture to carry the shining torch of truth. Oh yeah and Romero has a cameo as a government/military official telling us, "Everything is going to be okay."

At least it was better than Land of the Dead. I guess. The more I think about it the less I like it.

Gary Gygax: HP 0. Resurrected in better plane.

Gary Gygax has passed on at the age of 69. He was one of the guys in the USA to develop what we know of as RPGs. If you're familiar with the game Dungeons & Dragons - or any of the many TSR (formerly TSR) products - then you have Gygax to thank. Pretty much RPGs wouldn't be jack without his contributions. Cheers to you Gary Gygax, cheers to you.

Hedgie pic Monday.

As some of you may know I love hedge hogs. I don't know why. Normally I am a cat person but there's just something about hedge hogs. In any case thanks to Jenna for the picture.

Rating!

Check it out. Over there on the right. A rating from blogged.com. Not too shabby. You should go over there and shamelessly plug my site. Or not.

Chromehounds (2006) - Initial thoughts.

I am only a couple of hours into Chromehounds and already I am hooked. It wasn't really all that great until I linked up four assault machine guns to fire at once. In the immortal words of Clarence Boddicker, "GUNS! GUNS! GUNS!". Then I started really tinkering with constructing - with what limited resources I have - a mech or 'Hound as they are known in this game(sidenote: If you're not familiar with the term mech then just think about big fucking robots with big fucking guns).

I really dig this game and look forward to seriously putting some time into it. Basically the whole premise is "Blah, blah, blah, war. Blah, blah, blah, mercenaries. Join a squad, train, get better gear, blast the living hell out of other squads. Attempt to win war. It's the customization and squad combat on Live that I'm looking forward to. I just have to keep building my funds and supplies so my 'Hound is the equivalent of a soapbox racer at the Indy 500.

If I can get a screen capture I'll put it on here.

Rise (2007) dir. Sebastian Gutierrez

Rise lasted about a week in the theater and it's easy to see why. Vampire movies are a tough sell that seem to come into their own when they are available to watch at home. I don't know why and that may be a whacko guess but it seems true. The general public just doesn't really seem to care or it might be that most vampire movies are pretty bad.

Rise isn't bad. It's not great but it's not bad and the amount of nudity and blood definitely improved it. At one point I joked that the movie should've been called "Lucy Liu doesn't wear a shirt". One of the high points of the movie is Cameron Richardson in lingerie. Seriously.

The acting isn't bad at all. Some of the best scenes are between Michael Chikilis and Lucy Liu. The score is fairly forgetable. Amanda noticed that the sound editing was off or needed to be dialed back - footsteps sounded absurdly loud.

Amanda enjoyed this movie a lot more than I did but then again she's a vampire movie fan.

Professor Layton and the Curious Village, Elder Scrolls IV Oblivion, assorted news & notes.

Hope you folks had a good weekend. We laid low and since chores were done last weekend there wasn't anything pressing that needed doing. I jumped back into Elder Scrolls: Oblivion and polished off the main story line of Shivering Isles and the Knights of the Nine quest. I still have a pretty ridiculous amount of gameplay left in it if I really wanted to get my money's worth but really - do I really care that much about closing all sixty Oblivion Gates? What sucks is I'd like to create a new character but I don't want to have to go through all the work - to the tune of 230+ hours of gaming.

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Picked up Professor Layton and the Curious Village for the DS Lite - basically a point & click puzzle game. I really enjoy it but occasionally the puzzles make me feel like this Penny Arcade comic. I really do enjoy the puzzles. They range from "move the matchstick..." to optical illusions to word problems to "How the fuck was I supposed to know that !?!". I kind of like the fact that it's as challenging as it is but there's often a straight forward solution if you don't get frazzled. The game also has a really unique look to it - almost as if it were in Triplets of Belville-verse. I can only play the game for brief periods of time before getting frustrated because I am lunkhead who can't remember the Pythagorean Theorem.

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I have been hankering for a mech game but as far as I can tell there are only two for the 360: Chromehounds & Armored Core 4 - neither of which really sound all that awesome. Chromehounds does sound better - it focuses on online mech squad play. I often wonder why there's such a serious lack in the mech department. Who wouldn't want to play a game with giant robots bashing the shit out of things?

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That's it in a nutshell. Started taking medication so we'll see how that works out. Hope all of you are well and have a good week.

It's funny because it's true.

Acheivement Whores - Watch more free videos

007 and the modicum of chillax: first look at the teaser poster.

Netflix & XBOX Live or how I pooped on myself even more.

So there was an article on MSNBC about a possible merger between Netflix & XBOX Live. I'm a big fan of being able to download movies from XBOX Live so expanding the collection available would be pretty darn neat. While I do miss special features more often than not the special features are worthless anyway - unless it Guillermo Del Toro. I hope this comes to pass.

Movie Review Query Engine or how I just pooped on myself.

I was looking for reviews of Death Wish and came across the Movie Review Query Engine. As some of you may know I love reading reviews - good and bad. It's pretty cool to be able to check out reviews from all types of sources not just the few on metacritic.com

The Brave One (2007) Dir. Neil Jordan

It's very difficult not to make comparisons between The Brave One (2007) and Taxi Driver (1976) or Death Wish (1974). The Brave One plays like a combination of the two but can't really make the movie gel. There are other vengeance movies but these three in particular use New York City not only as a location but as a character. Unlike the NYC of thirty years ago today's NYC is a "Disneyland, safe for tourists and out-of-towners" and "the safest big city in the world." The Brave One chips at this new and shiny veneer but never really gets past it.

The basic premise of The Brave One is pretty simple. Jodie Foster plays Erica Bain, a public radio talk show host who wanders the city recording ambient sound and saying public radio stuff about the changing city, etc, etc. If you listen to NPR you'll know what I mean. Her fiance is the Indian guy from Lost - Naveen Andrews. I was worried there would be some sort racial hate crime factor but there wasn't. I was also glad to see that Jodie Foster wasn't a lesbian - that would have been too heavy handed and would have turned the movie into a preachier IFC movie. One night Erica and her fiance take their dog for a walk in Central Park. A gang of hoodlums take the dog, beat the fiance to death, and put Jodie Foster in a coma. It's actually a jarringly violent scene - as it should be - but it's also given a eerily realistic quality by the fact that one of the assailants is digitally recording it. I don't know why that aspect made me uneasy - possibly because sick fuckers actually do this and rewatch it for fun. Bain ends up in a coma for weeks, wakes up, and is a total mental trainwreck who can't leave her apartment. Then one day she buys a pistol and we all know what happens after that.

Foster is pretty good in The Brave One and Terence Howard is hands down one of my current favorite actors. The cinematography is solid and Neil Jordan is still a pretty sharp director. Unfortunately the script and story are pretty weak with and ending that pretty much flushes any message or credibility the movie could have had. I was actually looking forward to a film about the effects of intense violence on a person - mentally, spiritually, ethically, and morally (what I was hoping to get from A History of Violence)- and the effects of her vigilante rampage would have on the general public. These were all touched upon in the movie but only in passing, Bernie Goetz is mentioned even. I guess I was also expecting a "bad old New York" feel - a.k.a. beneath all the lights and sparkle there's a festering sewer of humanity. The first half of the movie is actually pretty good now that I think about it but the second half is a complete and total cop-out. The ending seems like it was tacked on because test audiences didn't like the real ending.

In the end The Brave One falls pretty flat and doesn't put any real focus on any of the issues that could have been addressed. Disappointing at best.

Upcoming games I think I will purchase...or rent...

The Long Kinda Sorta Maybe Good Friday.

Kind of a quick rundown today - nothing major that I know of:

• Was sent an email by Mike this morning directing me to a link on Ain't it Cool about the digital editing of the US trailer for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. At first I was pretty annoyed but the annoyance has shifted over to, "Well that's fucking typical." Apparently MP40s (German submachine guns) are not supposed to be pointed at our heroes. I rewatched the trailer with a more critical eye and realize that the CGI doesn't really look all that good. I'm a little disappointed but remember that the Indy series has some terrible FX. I guess I'll just have to get over it.
• One of my favorite webcomics Questionable Content has taken a sort of surprising direction. Not to say that I didn't see it coming I just didn't think that it would actually happen. Hey, some people watch WB shows. I read webcomics.
• I'm working on adding/tweaking/fiddling the links at the bottom of the page as well as some of the feeds and good stuff like that. Trying to make it a little more one stop shopping.
• BCIII has been adding more trailers and good stuff over at http://pihytrailers.blogspot.com/.
• If any of you have a copy of James Horner's score for Krull please let me know. Don't mock just because it's Krull - it's a really good score.
• The GTAIV site is live. I am torn between devouring all the info I can and just avoiding any and all news about it.

That's all for now folks. Hope you guys have a good weekend. I'm gonna be on lockdown because the house is a shambles and I'm wearing my emergency clean clothes.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

Monday: Weekend recap, assorted news, updates, and goodness.

I had to start today's post with that. Thanks to Mark for sharing Rap Lyric Charts & Graphs.

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Roy Scheider died. He is no longer picking his toes in Poughkeepsie. I always did like him.

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You might have seen the TV Spot for Lost Odyssey with White Rabbit playing in the background. Here's the extended TV spot.

It could be a good game but then again it could be a Final Fantasy knock-off with all the JRPG themes and look and Nobuo Uematsu scoring. Release date is tomorrow and I'll just have to see what the reviews say before I pick it up.

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I will reveal the new Super Secret Recipe over on Hooligan Youth Reviews Food either today or tomorrow.

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Bart's been putting more trailers up on Hooligan Youth & Peevish Insomniac Present: Movie trailers. Jeebus, we've got a site for evrything these days.

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Hope everyone is well and haven't been attacked by Brain Wasps.

Look what we have to work with.

These are some of my coworkers during the busy times: Flour Tortilla Jeremy and Baby Joey. Brings a tear to my eye - this blog's for you guys.

Turning Point: Fall of Liberty demo, Burnout Paradise online fun, and something else...

I' ve been pretty geared up for Turning Point: Fall of Liberty (02/26). Personally I am a huge sucker for speculative fiction based on the USA getting invaded - i.e. Red Dawn, Freedom Fighters, The Man in the High Castle. This isn't because I am not a patriot it's because I think Americans would kick the Hell out of an invading force. Could you imagine the Red Army trying to take down Chicago? The demo is available for download and it's impressive as all get out. I worry that it won't be able to go the distance - FPS tend to fall apart at the end. That doesn't mean I won't play the shit out it though.

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Burnout Paradise is a frickin' blast online. It's because it's so easy to get online - if you have an account that is - just tap right on the D-pad and select what you want. Sometimes the servers get bogged down but more often than not there's no delay in game play - no pain in the ass menus or waiting period. I'm a big fan of ghosting people who are crashing and smashing - if someone is just running time laps or jumps or basically not bothering anyone I leave them alone. I do love smashing the living shit out of opponents though and playing high speed chase. I was joking with Amanda that Burnout Paradise is nothing but big kids playing Hot Wheels.


I forgot what the something else was...oh yeah!

For those of you still playing Mass Effect - there will be downloadable content March 10th. It will introduce a new race and new planet and will called Bring Down the Sky and will be available for 400 points. I think that's pretty cool. I already sold my copy so if someone downloads this let me know how it is.

Rambo (2008) dir. Sylvester Stallone & War (2007) dir. Philip G. Atwell

I'm gonna get this out of the way - you either want to see this movie or you don't. If you don't that's fine and understandable though First Blood is a good movie. If you are going to see Rambo then you know exactly what you are getting.

Personally I liked it. I had a crappy morning and went to go see it with some buddies and it turned my mood around. Rambo kills the living hell out of bad Burmese. It's not quite as gory as I was led to believe - yes it is gory and intensely violent - but a good amount of the blood is digital. Digital blood just doesn't cut it in my book. There are some moments of cheer worthy carnage though.

Here's the plot: Rambo is a snake hunter/collector in Thailand. He is very sad and alone with his anger and pain. Christian missionaries need his help getting up river to Burma to deliver medical aid and care. Rambo says, "Go home.". Missionary lady says, "Help us." Rambo says, "Fine." Rambo drops off missionaries and goes home. Missionaries help people then get captured by evil Burmese warlord. Rambo finds out. Everything goes to hell. Rambo kicks ass. Bad guys die. Fin.

I thought the direction was perfectly reasonable and all in all there was nothing wrong with the movie - what'd you expect fucking Chekov? It's Rambo. I really enjoyed the ending - it tied up the entire series very nicely.

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War is a Jet Li/Jason Statham action movie by Philip G. Atwell (director of rap videos). We watched it last night after gorging ourselves on Chinese BBQ and shredded Nanking pork. We wanted something totally mindless, violent, and about as challenging as Go Fish. War not only delivered but it was actually pretty good and an excellent example of what a non-HK/HK-styled movie should be like. All the elements were there and put together in a proper fashion. Jason Statham plays some ass kicking Asian crime unit of the FBI guy. His partner gets killed by Jet Li - a super bad ass CIA trained assassin who is only known as "Rogue". Rogue disappears. Three years later there a territory is breaking out in San Francisco between Triads and the Yakuza. Side note: Just to let everyone - including Jason Statham - know "Yakuza" is plural for "Yakuza". A Yakuza club is shot to hell by...that's right...Rogue. Jason Statham is on the job. Action and vengeance ensues.

War is absurd and pretty cut and dry - especially if you've seen a good amount of HK action movies - but the direction is slick, the violence is bloody, there are fucking ninjas, the cast is a good who's who of quality supporting actors, the music is good cinematic hip-hop, and it's actually a good Jet Li/Jason Statham movie. A good Saturday afternoon movie, hell I'll buy it when I see it for about $10.

Burnout Paradise, Advance Wars: Days of Ruin, GTA IV, and more...

If you're not familiar with the Burnout series then drop whatever it is you're doing and go buy a copy of Burnout 3. It's my favorite racing series because:

1. I suck at racing games and yet I can play the hell out of a Burnout game.
   
2. People can just pick up and play these games.
   
3. The level of destruction and lots of pretty pretty sparks.


4. In real life you really wish you could slam some annoying bastard's car into oncoming traffic or into a median.
   

Burnout Paradise is the latest installation in the series and so far is proving to be an exciting addition. I put in about five hours last night and was beginning to think it was too easy. Then I played a race and got totally wiped so I guess it's not too easy. What I like about the game is that the map is totally open from the start. Every intersection and stretch of road has some kind of event to play. Starting a race consists of driving around, coming up to an intersection, and pulling LT & RT. The race starts. There's a lot to find and explore in this game - which is one of my favorite tasks in games. The Road Rages are fun especially since the other cars will find you instead of having to find them - meaning you can careen through construction sites and cut throughs at top speed instead of sticking to the main streets. I like addition of the Marked Man races - get to the finish line in one piece with enemy vehicles trying to wreck you all the way. The Racing is fun though frustrating because there are so many ways to go. Once you have a solid knowledge of cut-throughs and sneaky way then it makes it a lot more fun - i.e. I won a backwoods curving roads race by simply driving straight down the railroad tracks at full speed.
The game looks great, the cars are fun to drive, the crashes are wicked gnarly, and I look forward to playing it online. The one downside is the music. It's a strange mix of old and new and cuts from earlier Burnout games. After a while I turned it off and just listened to The Sword.

Advance Wars: Days of Ruin is a DS Lite turn based strategy game based in a post-apocalyptic world. Meteroids struck the Earth and everything went to shit and now it's up to our heroes to band together and fight bandits and assorted whackos. So far it's addictive as a sonofabitch and hopefully has a boatload of replay value.

There is finally a release date for GTA IV 04-29-08. Finally a reason to get up in the morning.

Heath Ledger overdoses. Permanently.

Wow. Well at least Batman was finished. I just hope we don't have to see millions of retrospectives like we did when River Phoenix died.

Pandora, Metal, Work, and the Tree of Woe.

I finally got a day off after 18 days in the tall grass. Fortunately the hours have gone back to normal (9-5) though the hours may still be 9-7.

One good thing to have come out of the last few weeks was the amount of labour I've put into working on my Pandora playlists. If you're not familiar with Pandora then let me fill you in - it's a "Music Genome Project". Basically it's a music player based on your tastes...more or less. You can thumbs up and thumbs a track a la yahoo radio but with better results and better music. If you scroll down a bit after reading this you'll see radio stations I've been working on. Click the link.

Another good thing that has come out this Pandora experimentation has been my finding of "new" and "interesting" music. From here on out I'm gonna be talking about Metal so if you don't have any interest in Metal quit reading.

I am a Metal fan. However I am not a metal fan that will listen to anything and in all honesty most Metal would be better off if there wasn't a lead singer - especially one who barks lyrics. So one day I checked out Pandora's "Stoner Metal Rock" station. Diretly before tuning into the station I was bitching/whinging/being Josh about, "I wish there was Metal that was actually good...you know like the first three Sabbath albums...etc, etc, etc..." I turned on the station and heard The Sword and my jaw dropped.

The Sword fucking rock. After I did my chores I cracked open a beer. Yay rewards! I played some music and just dicked around and then I said, "Fuck! The Sword!". I downloaded the album and have listened to it pretty much nonstop for the past several hours. It's heavy. It grinds. There are songs about wolves. I'm amazed this band is from Austin. It's awesome. I wish I was listening to it right now. In fact:

Witch is also good but after a while I realized that it sounds...too polished. Witch is a project of J. Mascis - Dinosaur Jr - and is good but sounds like an album that was made by someone who plays other stuff normally. Still makes for good Heavy Metal listening though.

More news to follow. Going to see Cloverfield tonight.

"I pray to Shiva - Please, let me die."

How's that for a flashback? I first saw it in '96 and it warped my fragile little mind. Thanks, Mike! What is kind of strange is watching EBN's videos and they are still pertinent. Y'know what with the war and everything.

Still busy at work but I had to make a post. Check out this trailer. If you've seen it already you'll understand my excitement:

Oh. Hells. Yes. The other day I was shipping books and chatting with Mark and said, "I wonder what Neil Marshall's been doin'?" Apparently he has been making awesome. Sheer and total awesome. Comes out March 14th. I can't wait.

There's more assorted news and reviews coming down the line but that'll have to wait until I get a day off.

Update and a minor rant.

Going to be absent for a bit longer folks. School starts on Monday and all the students are coming back and going to storm the walls.

Oh yeah, minor rant.

Spiderman 3 was so bad that when it was over I said, "I want to starve a badger, hit it constantly with a stick, and then mail it to Sam Raimi. When he opened the box the badger would latch onto him, peel the skin off his face, burrow down his throat, and tear him open from the inside." I hated Spiderman 3. I'm not a Spiderman fan, personally I don't like Spiderman period, but Spiderman 3 was almost worse than Daredevil, Elektra, Ghost Rider, and the Tom Jane Punisher combined. Don't waste your money on this crap splatter.

Hope all of you are well. Upcoming reviews and a return to regularly scheduled blogging ASAP.

"Can you not see that I am direspectful to dirt?"

Hope all you fine folks had a perfectly reasonable holiday season. Ours was good. Saw Amanda's family. Drove around in the new car. Ate too much. Drank too much. Got presents. Oh yeah and Amanda and I are officially engaged. I'm sure there will be some kind of formal announcement of some sorts, consider yourselves warned.

In other news:

Amanda bought me a DS Lite and it is awesome. Okay she bought me one because I wouldn't stop using hers truth be told. I'm a couple of hours into Hotel Dusk: Room 215 and am enjoying it. Basically it's a noir-ish plot with lots of dialogue and some interesting puzzles. Nothing mind bending but nothing too simple either. I like the character design - black and white hand drawn - and the plot has been interesting enough for me to keep playing. Warhammer 40K: Squad Command is something I would recommend to a Warhammer 40K fan or possibly and turn based tactical game but for most people I wouldn't recommend it. It's cheezy and not the easiest game I've ever played. Personally I think with a little bit of spit and polish it would make an excellent XBOX360 Live game but that's just me. I love playing it though and have gotten some good laughs out of it - i.e. the catch phrase "I AM THE BRINGER OF DEATH!" makes me giggle. I am waiting for Amanda to finish Rune Factory: A Fantasy Harvest Moon because well...it looks kind of damn neat and she's been playing the living hell out of it. Plus I'm in the mood for a soul sucking RPG.

As far as movies watched over the holiday break well...didn't see much. The only movie I got to see in the theater was Sweeny Todd. It was okay I guess. I really didn't enjoy it very much at all but they - Amanda & her sisters - liked it and had a good time. I guess I'm just done with Tim Burton, Johnny Depp, and Helena Bonham Carter and the whole Burtonverse.

Saw Once on DVD. It was charming, bittersweet, Irish, and all in all was a pretty good movie that didn't go quite in the direction I thought it was going to. The soundtrack by The Frames is solid singer/songwriter guitar/piano stuff. Personally it's not my normal cup of tea but for a quiet afternoon it was a nice movie.

Watched the latest Harry Potter & the Whatever Whatever last night. It was pretty good I guess but I could tell that there was a lot left out from the book or glossed over or cherry picked. I haven't read the books either and I could tell. All in all it was a Harry Potter movie. There was some magic and some Alan Rickman and some Voldemort and a John Williams score.

That's the long and short of it folks. I'm going to be going online to wage war in Call of Duty 4 so you can expect a review/rant about me getting "pwned" by fourteen year olds.

Grahgh! Finally a word from Hooligan Youth!

December buybacks have come to an end. That was exhausting. Those of you fine folks who are getting presents in the mail will be getting them when I have the chance to - no worries.

I will try to get a post up about the movies and games and assorted goodness during the break. I hope that all of you are well and have/are having a good holiday. Don't panic.

Much love and assorted warm fuzzy feelings.

xoxoxoxo

Hooligan Youth a.k.a. Joshua

Hooray for cthulonic fantasy!

Hellboy II: The Golden Army trailer

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I liked the first one but this movie may actually be good!
enjoy!

Finally the real thing!

Thats right kids the First official poster for the new Indiana Jones film.
I'm sorta worried about this movie, but after seeing that they went with the original style poster art I am sorta warmed in the cockles by it...but maybe that just the wool pants I have on.
But hey, its our old pal indy!

Woo! Warhammer! Woo!

Mass Effect (2007)

I polished off Mass Effect on Sunday after forty something hours of gameplay. I'm pretty sure that I did everything in the game - I managed to get the Completionist achievement - but it didn't seem like there was that much to do. Maybe I'm just used to other RPGs that are pretty much time sinks *cough* Oblivion *cough*. I guess I was expecting something more...well more...

Mass Effect is an impressive game from character creation all the way to the cliffhanger ending. I enjoyed the hours of dialogue and depths of the Codex. I enjoyed driving the Mako across planetscapes and using it the run over Geth. There were a few moments where I worried about the characters and the events unfolding around them. Hard decisions were made and consequences were felt. The Universe was saved but was the cost worth it? The storyline is pretty straight forward if you're familiar with the Space Opera genre: bad guys are up to good, grim hero and companions are out to right wrongs and kick ass, experimental space ship with smart ass pilot - very ably voiced by Seth Green, pissed off alien allies, a seriously daunting foe, and a touch of romance.

I don't really have any problems with Mass Effect. I would recommend it to a friend or neighbour. A lot of the problems reviews had - slow elevators, load times, cumbersome inventory screens, driving the Mako, etc., etc. - didn't really bother me all that much. Personally I liked the elevators - they were an opportunity to have a stretch or go get a drink - plus there was dialogue between characters and on the Citadel there were news casts. So where is my vague sense of dissatisfaction coming from? The voice work of Jennifer Hale as the main character Commander Shepard was top notch, the story satisfying, the graphics great to look at, gameplay was perfectly reasonable, and yet I feel like I didn't get my fill. You ever been to a top notch restaurant and been blown away by the food but afterwards you realize that you're still hungry? That's the way I feel about Mass Effect.


Quite possibly the fact that I played Mass Effect very soon after I was playing KOTOR led to some disappointment. Where KOTOR allows for much more character control and influencing other characters and events Mass Effect just allows you to go in one direction or another. I also noticed that the other characters weren't terribly bothered by your actions. Where in KOTOR characters would make you guilty for being bad in Mass Effect they don't really care too much.

Sad to say the more I think about the game and what I liked and what I didn't like I and what I'm on the fence about the more I think, "Meh." If you're in the market for a RPG then I certainly recommend it - just don't expect the epic scope that some RPGs have - but if you're not an RPG fan I wouldn't bother.

The Mist (2007) dir. Frank Darabont

The Mist has been one of my favorite Stephen King novellas for years though I can never remember if it's in Skeleton Crew or Night Shift...I think it's in Skeleton Crew. In any case I wasn't particularly thrilled about a movie adaptation until I found out that Frank "Shawshank" Darabont was directing. He has a good handle on the whole King vibe and in any case it's a horror movie and I have a bad habit of seeing whatever horror movie is in the theater unless it's Saw XXIII.

Long and short The Mist is a good solid monster movie that for me took a nose dive into melodrama in the last minute - literally the last minute of the movie. I would have enjoyed the movie more if there weren't a couple of jerk offs talking through the movie and some old guy whose snoring was primordial. Seriously this guy sounded like a sound effect from the movie.

If you're going to see The Mist then I do recommend seeing it in the theater. Personally I would like to see it at a Drive In but that's just me.

Because I love you all so very much...

Hitman (2007) dir. Xavier Gens

I'm gonna get this out of the way right at the start here and say, "Hey reviewers who panned this movie - go fuck yourselves. Go watch another fucking Wes Anderson movie."



With that out of the way Hitman is not a great movie but what the hell are you expecting Chekov? It's not only an action movie but an action movie based on a video game. Hitman is better than The Transporter series, better than The Marine, and better than most of Van Damage's movies period.



This is the kind of movie you go see with your buddies - or kick ass girlfriend - and have a good time. You cheer when Agent 47 kicks the hell out of dudes, wolf whistle when the hot Russian chick wanders around half naked, laugh at a particularly gruesome kill and just enjoy yourselves on a Saturday afternoon.

What really sets Hitman apart is how high quality the movie is - a fact the reviews don't mention. Cinematographer Laurent Bares makes every shot look professionally slick and cool in a European way - not in the cheap made on HD way a lot of action movies have now. The music was perfectly reasonable for not being a Jesper Kyd score. It was mainly some kind of Euro electronic action-y score. Nothing really special but at least it wasn't some bullshit hip-hop score.

Hitman delivered for me. Hell if you don't believe me then see what Ebert had to say.

Thanksgiving, Signature Pork, Mass Effect, and an upcoming Hitman review.

Like my grandpa used to say, "There's another Thanksgiving shot in the ass." but in a good way. It used to piss me off when he would say that but now I'm beginning to appreciate the sentiment. There's lots of work and build up and what not and then it's over. "Is that all there is to Thanksgiving?"

Actually Thanksgiving was a good time. Thanks to Bart & Sarah for cooking and letting me use the grill - I made beef ribs. They were pretty good. Friday went off without a hitch - this year I realized that prep work makes cooking much easier. I might put up a post on the food site.

Better than feeding and fellowship and hugging fun I got to spend some serious time playing Mass Effect.

How good is Mass Effect? Well...if you like sci-fi space opera RPG talkies with some action, a lot of sci-fi codex mumbo jumbo, and a game that will suck up all your free time to the point you don't want to eat - Ctrl+Alt+Del has a good comic about this - then you might want to pick up this game.

The appeal of Mass Effect really comes down to the story and the ability to shape and direct conversations with NPCs. If you've played KOTOR then you'll know what you're in for. I am pretty interested in my responses to situations and other characters. I've noticed that I don't respond well to aggression or authority or both and have a tendency to help aliens. I miss the bounty hunter and double crosses of KOTOR but in Mass Effect I have plenty of opportunities for graft and corruption. Oddly enough this means my character is pretty much in the middle neither good nor bad - Paragon and Renegade in Mass Effect.

I want to put together a big review of the game once I finish it which at this rate should be soon.

We also went to go see Hitman. I liked it, I liked it a lot actually. It was exactly what I was expecting. A lengthier review is pending.

Happy Preemptive Thanksgiving Airstrike!

"I don't know if it's art..."

Going to have a good block of time off for the Thanksgiving so I won't be posting for a bit. Figured I'd throw together a post to tide you over.

I was weak and broke down and picked up Mass Effect. Just to let you know I don't have a sack full of money with which to buy games - I've been basically rotating credit. On the upside I don't think that there are any more games I want to pick up before the new GTA comes out.

Looks like I'm gonna be putting ribs on the grill this Thanksgiving. I know, I know, "It's not turkey?!?" but since turkey has become a non-holiday food I'm just not very impressed. I don't know if I'm gonna be doing pork or beef. Chances are I'll be doing beef since I plan on making my slow roasted pork on Friday for the Misfit Toys Thanksgiving.

If you feel so inclined gimme a call or drop me a line or send hate mail. Hope you guys have a good holiday. Don't kill your loved ones no matter how much they ask for it.

xoxo

All of us at Hooligan Youth Reviews...except me.

Assassin's Creed, Kane & Lynch: Dead Men, and Fresca.

After a good chunk of game time with Assassin's Creed and an another block of time with Kane & Lynch: Dead Men this weekend. When all is said and done I should have picked up Kane & Lynch.

Assassin's Creed is a great looking game that is fun and exciting to play but there's not really anything to do after a couple of hours. The story is the only thing keeping me playing truth be told. The problem I have is that there's really not much substance to Assassin's Creed gameplay wise. You enter a new part of the city, scout out the View Points, rescue citizens, beat information out of a few folks, run a few timed missions, pickpocket, eavesdrop, head to the Bureau, get the assassination mission, go kill the target, escape the guards, get back to the Bureau. You do that for each hit - 9 hits total. The first couple of times it's fun but after awhile - to paraphrase - "I think to myself is that all there is to Assassin's Creed?" I'm gonna give it another shot at least to finish out the story but my heart's not really in it.

Kane & Lynch: Dead Men is quite possibly one of the meanest games I have ever played. Parts are profanity-inducing difficult but that's not what I mean by "mean". Kane & Lynch plays like one of my favorite violent crime movies. The characters are just straight up bastards, psychos, sociopaths, and degenerates with no redeeming qualities. Add in a pervasive sense of depressing, violent stoicism and you've got a happy Josh.

Some of the reviews I read knocked the game because of the controls but they work for me. The reason they work for me is because they are Io Interactive controls. The game plays very similarly to Freedom Fighters with a radial inventory, the same squad command icons and controls, and desperate run & gun combat. Personally I think the combat kind of kicks ass and if you can use your squad effectively then it makes survival much easier but not by much. Expect to die...a lot. The amount of firepower that sometimes is directed towards you is daunting at times. While trying to escape a Japanese high rise through the front door gave me pause. I sent my squad out first and hung back lobbing smoke and frag grenades and picking off any SWAT who stuck their heads out. I still got picked off and had to restart the scene several times. Another level is based in a nightclub and makes for some awesome gunbattle action what with strobes, smoke, pumping techno, gunfire, and hordes of fleeing patrons screaming in Japanese. This is the kind of game where you can clear a path in the crowd by mowing them down to get a clear shot on your opponent. I noticed too Lynch executes the wounded - cops, gangsters, and civilians alike - if he gets near them. It's actually kind of disturbing but another detail that makes the game so effective.

Of course I have to mention the Jesper Kyd score - yes, yes we all know I heart Jesper Kyd. It's a really bad ass score - even for him. While Hitman had a slick ambient assassin score and Freedom Fighters had an epic "Let's kick Commie ass." score Kane & Lynch has an "I am a bad man doing bad things." score. Don't know what I mean? Imagine that you and your crew are rappeling down the side of skyscraper after getting into a gunfight on the roof. You set explosives to blow out the glass and proceed to machine gun everyone in the room. Got it? Okay now what music is in your head? Probably something pretty similar to Kyd's score for Kane & Lynch.

Kane & Lynch is one hell of a game but in all honesty it's not a blockbuster, there's not a lot of gloss and glitz to the game. I give it a bit more slack because I view it as a training wheels game for Io on the 360. Sure they made a version of Hitman: Blood Money for the 360 but it was just a glossier version of the PS2 version - actually the 360 version looks so much better I was surprised at how rough the PS2 version looks in comparison. It's not a sophisticated example of tactical squad combat at its best. If you're into hardboiled crime/action movies where everyone is pretty much violent, cruel, bitter, and emotionally scarred then you'll enjoy Kane & Lynch.


Oh yeah and Fresca is pretty good even if people think it's an old person drink.

Something totally inappropriate that amuses me.

"I have seen shit that would turn you white."

I could dork out but you gotta see this:

"Time to get your crayons and your pencils!"

Got a run down of stuff this fine Friday:

• Ctl+Alt+Del has a pretty funny comic about the state of affairs this game season. There are just too many games being released at once.
• Assassin's Creed won the "I only have enough money for one game" battle versus Kane & Lynch. I am - so far - totally in love with the game. I could get all gushy and doe-eyed but you really need to play this for yourself. My current fantasy is renting a theater for a day and playing it on a massive screen - there are moments of this game that are so big that they practically demand a large screen tv. I am also going to load my scores for The Mummy, The 13th Warrior, and Lawrence of Arabia because I am a geek. And?
• Have you noticed that this Thanksgiving is one of the more serious and violent as far as movie releases go? Don't get me wrong I love it but y'have to admit that it's a bit strange. Where's my Ice Cube family comedy? Shouldn't Robin Williams be wrapping my heart in his big furry monkey arms? Don't you want Robin Williams to warm your heart? Yes. Yes. You do.

There was more but I got hungry then ate a snadwich and forgot what I was going on about. Have a good weekend. Don't bother calling - I'll be playing Assassin's Creed.

30 Days of Night (2007)

I have to admit that I wasn't expecting much from 30 Days of Night. I read Steve Niles' first graphic novel with that title - I think there a slew of them out now. It was a solid vampire tale with a great story and amazing art work. Maybe saying that I wasn't expecting much from the screen adaptation is incorrect - I was expecting it to mirror the graphic novel. It did.

It's been a couple of years since I read 30 Days of Night and didn't remember much so the movie wasn't completely spoiled - well we saw it at the Alamo Drafthouse but more on that later. The acting was fine, there were a couple of tense scares, the vampires were pretty scary looking actually and not mince mince sissy vampires, there was minimal use of humor, there was some satisfying gore, and all in all it worked. It was kind of nice to see a vampire movie that didn't try to reinvent the genre or sex it up or make it all "cool" like Blade or Underworld.

Pretty much if you're going to see 30 Days of Night you've either already seen it or are waiting for it to come out on DVD. I enjoyed it but would have rather seen American Gangster.


P.S.

The Alamo Drafthouse is not the place to see a horror movie if you actually want to watch and enjoy it. It may be all well and good to see The Monster Squad or whatever dreck Tarantino is passing off as art and have some drinks and dinner and have a good time but God forbid you actually want to watch a movie in peace and quiet. This is why I go to matinees.

Hedgehogs make me happy.

If I could I would own a hedgehog. They seem like they have personality.

"At the sound of the whip, turn the page."

BC3 sent me some awesome news today: there's gonna be a LEGO Indiana Jones game. Based on the strength of the LEGO Stars Wars series. To think that the other day I was complaining about the lack of a good Indiana Jones game.

Macbeth (2006) and Knights of the Old Republic (2004)

I picked up Bioware's Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic on Friday and didn't get much sleep over the weekend. I'm not sure why I waited so long to play it but it's really quite enjoyable so far. I might slap together a review once I get deeper into the game. If Bioware's next epic sci-fi RPG Mass Effect (11/20) is as good as KotOR then Bioware's gonna sell a million bajillion copies - including one to me.

In between non-stop Jedi RPGing we ate a home made chicken pot pie and watched a new "sexy and high octane" adaptation of Macbeth. It was pretty damn cool actually. Put together with a bunch of grizzled Australians it's a modern update of the "Scottish play" guns, drugs, techno, and naked chicks. We were actually surprised at how good it was though Amanda was disappointed that the porter was cut out - no need for comedy in this movie. Macbeth moves along very quickly and many of the Shakespearean references are very cleverly done. Burnham Wood has been turned into a Burnham Timber logging truck. Very well done, very enjoyable. If you have the chance rent it and it also available for download on the XBOX360.

Marky Mark = Max Payne?!?

Rockstar's Max Payne is an experience - talk about a mean, gritty, and just plain old twisted series. The fact that Marky Mark is taking on the titular role is just plain awesome. What? I love Marky Mark - I ain't shamed. Filming starts next year. Cross our fingers and hope for and R rating.

COD4: Modern Warfare review continued...sort of...

Gabe over at Penny Arcade had this to say and I completely agree with him:

• "It's funny, in the end it turns out I'm not a big fan of COD 4. I tossed it in last night and played through the first handful of levels. It certainly looks great but I think Rainbow 6: Vegas has really spoiled me. The lack of a cover system in COD is really frustrating to me. It looks and feels like a tactical squad shooter. Only I don't have any ability to play tactically or control my squad. The enemies can blind fire from behind cover but apparently I can't? My teammates can shoot the hinges off a door and then kick it in but I can't so much as jiggle a doorknob? After R6 I never thought I'd have to toss a flash bang into a room by standing in the middle of the doorway again. Visually it's a real stunner but game play wise it feels dated to me."

He's right - all the problems I have with this game are because of the controls. In fact one of the most annoying aspects of gameplay is the fact that enemies will continue to spawn in checkpoint areas until you charge in and hopefully clear the building. This makes for some exciting and harrowing gun battles it doesn't make for tactically challenging combat. Plus the levels are short. Okay, the over all level isn't short but it's made up of short scenes that chop it up. Medal of Honor Airborne had some sprawling levels - the Factory level comes to mind - that COD4 could have really benefitted from.

What really is awesome about COD4 is that when it's on - it's on. Since this isn't a tactical shooter the combat is close and fast and furious. There are points in the game when the amount of supressive fire the enemy cranks out is pretty frickin daunting. The levels that break the mold - one of my favorite levels of the game is providing fire support from a C130 gunship.

COD4 truly shines in the realistic world it's created. This game has my new favorite opening credits - the cinema is from the POV of a newly deposed president beaten and thrown in the back of a car. As the vehicle crosses the city you can control the camera and watch the insanity. In all honesty I was kind of shaken - a strange sensation to get from a video game. The graphics are so high quality that it could have been the beginning of a movie. A minor complaint about the game is that I can't watch the cinematics without playing through the level. The story of COD4 is pretty straight forward: evil foreigner says fuck you to democracy and all that. Democracy says fuck you and kicks evil foreigner ass. It's the delivery of the story that makes it though. I look forward to seeing it through to the end.

I'll wrap it up this evening or this weekend and let you fine folks know my final thoughts. I did pick up Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic though and that might get some play tonight. We'll see.

COD4: Modern Warfare, assorted news, and another Chinese poison toy plot?

A bunch of news, trailers, and assorted goodness today:

1) This looks particularly awesome:





2) I picked up Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare yesterday. It is very, very well done - any of the problems I have with the game are nitpicky issues. I'm going to put in some time playing online this weekend. Hopefully I won't get fragged to hell and back by a bunch of kids. Once I finish the campaign I'll write a proper review. To tide you over - here's some gameplay footage.






3) Once again the Chinese are gonna have to execute another executive - a policy I love and support - for putting a chemical that turns into GHB in kids toys. Tsk tsk tsk.

More remake silliness!

Looks like Keanu and Jennifer Connelly are going to be in 20th Century Fox remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still. I'm not opposed to the idea for once. It could be a pretty interesting version - especially in this technological day and age. The downside is that Fox will problably want to action it up which will be a shame.

Sly Stallone wants to remake Death Wish. Considering that Stallone's new Rambo movie is going to be a return to hardcore gore and action he could do a new Death Wish justice. The original wasn't the world's greatest movie to start with - certainly has its moments though.

"There was a fish in the perk-a-lator!"

Finally the fully remastered and complete Twin Peaks has been released in one set - including the pilot. Digitally remastered and full 5.1 sound! Hell yeah! It has a list price of $100 but on amazon it's $70. I do have the entire collection on VHS so it's not a priority but still...it'd be a nice thing to have.

Prey (XBOX360)

While I am patiently waiting for Kane & Lynch: Dead Men to come out next week I decided to take a break from Manhunt 2 and check out some of the demos I have missed on the X360. I've had the demo for Prey sitting around for a couple of days now but just haven't played it. I played through it last night and I have to say that I might have to rent it or pick it up used. Sure it's another FPS blasting the shit out of stuff but for some reason I was actually having a good time playing it.

First off the protagonist - Tommy - is a disaffected Cherokee guy with a chip on his shoulder who just wants to get off the reservation. I don't really want to give away anything about the game because the story is pretty damn cool and there were several times I said, "Well, that was unexpected."

Check out the demo - it's pretty neat.

Yo Jo...oh I don't care anymore.

The casting has begun for the G.I. Joe movie. Here's an article from Hasbro.

I don't care that "they" are making about a movie about toys I played with as a kid I think I'm bothered more by the fact that it's so fucking dumb. A G.I. Joe movie? With real people in it? Sure I would have loved to see this movie when I was ten but c'mon...who greenlighted this?

Then again...it is helmed by Stephen Sommers...and it would be kind of awesome if the Weather Dominator was in it...

Damn it. I still think this is a bad idea.

Manhunt 2 - Initial Impressions.

There's been plenty of talk about how horrifying and disturbing Manhunt 2 is. Penny Arcade's comic today made me laugh. Local news casters have been talking about how terrible the game is because it's a "murder simulator". I bought it because I'm a Rockstar fanboy and enjoyed Manhunt quite possibly more than I should have.

Manhunt 2 is okay. If you haven't played Manhunt then I recommend playing that instead. Maybe I am desensitized to over the top violence after decades of horror movies, video games, pornography, and local news but Manhunt 2 is seriously lacking in the creepy factor. Sure there are dismembered bodies and beatings and all sorts of unpleasantness but there's a cheap funhouse quality to the fear this time around. To be fair I am only a few hours in and there may be a couple of set pieces coming up that can take the Pepsi Challenge with Manhunt.

Here are the problems I currently have with the game:

• I don't know if I'm sold on the story. You play Danny Lamb and start the game in a mental institution. There's a power outage and the inmates go beserk - of course. You and a buddy take advantage of the ensuing chaos and escape. The storyline so far is that a secret government project has been kidnapping people, pumping them full of secret government drugs, and brain washing them into being psychos. It's up to Danny to find out what's happened to him and get revenge. It's not particularly fresh but will be okay/bearable for the rest of the game.
• The controls are weird and it's not because I haven't picked up a PS2 controller in awhile. Movement is controller with the left analog but the right analog doesn't really control the camera. Move the right analog left/right the camera leans - great for sneaking along walls and peeking around corners but little else. I often have to click R3 for first person camera control to look around the enivronment then click out and move. The L2 & R2 buttons are for strafing but I've found that I have to use a combination of left analog, strafing, and first person just to move around properly. Combat - fortunately - is pretty simple. L1 to lock, and R1 or square to strike. The rest of the controls are pretty solid though.
• Manhunt 2 is an ugly game. Granted it's a stealth killer game that takes place in asylums, slums, and generally ugly depressing places but Manhunt 2 just looks shabby. It doesn't make me want to stop playing the game - there are times though I am pulled out of game just because it's s'darn ugly.

On the upside:

• If you want a good creepy stealth slasher game for a reasonable price tag - $30.00 - then I whole heartedly recommend Manhunt 2.
• If you were a fan of Manhunt and want more then pick this up.
• The kills - while filtered - are still pretty horrific and satisfying in their own way. I'm a big fan of the ball point pen and can't wait to start collecting heads again - a favorite pasttime in Manhunt.
• With the Manhunt series Rockstar has managed to create some really repulsive enemies. From bondage lunatics to overly abusive orderlies these are some foes you really enjoying snuffing.
• Environmental kills - a new addition. I've only come across one so far - a toilet - and it was pretty cool. I hope there's a car crusher.
• Danny Lamb looks like me in that, "Hey a white guy with close cropped hair and black framed glasses." kind of way. Now I have a Halloween costume for next year with minimal effort. Rock.

All in all I'll keep playing Manhunt 2 and see it through but it's seriously missing the Rockstar spark. Rockstar games have a certain panache that's been on the decline - a lot of the humor of GTA:SA was forced and in LCS & VCS was borderline painful. Most games also had additions to the Rockstar gameplay machine - i.e. the targeting system from Manhunt was used in GTA:SA - Manhunt 2 doesn't have anything special to it. Then again Manhunt 2 is probably going to be one of the last outings for Rockstar and the PS2.

Condemned (11/15/05)

Condemned is not a bad game buuuut it's not all that great either. It's not so much that I have a problem with the game - I have a problem with the genre it belongs to and the way that genre is used in games. Condemned is a supernatural serial killer game that has loads of atmosphere, some decent scares, and lots and lots of dark, narrow passageways.

Ever since Se7en serial killer movies & games have been dark, stylish, and grimy in that particular Se7en way. While this works - up to a point - it's also been done to death (along with blue rinsed run down hospital wards). Early in the game a character comments on the fact that serial killers are constantly lurking in the darkest, dankest places. Apparently all of these dark, dank places are linked together by dark, dank corridors filled with homeless people waiting to attack you. Oh yeah and there's some kind of cock-a-mamie plot pulled from a Dean Koontz-esque beach read thriller. Something about dead birds and crazy people.

The combat in the game hinges on melee attacks - you can pull boards off of walls, wield rebar, and swing axes, shovels, crowbars, and other assorted implements of destruction. So can your opponents - which makes for some pretty tense action. I personally don't handle melee attacks very well. I'd rather just sit back and destroy opposition with ranged attacks. This made Condemned a little more than frustrating for me - especially one point where I had to take a guy down who had a pistol. I had a shovel.

A major problem I had with the game was the fact I couldn't return to previous areas - I don't mean earlier levels - I mean earlier parts of the same level. This was a problem because I couldn't double back for health, items, or exploration. Some doors can only be opened with certain tools but tough cookies if you had to ditch your axe or crowbar or firearm earlier.

Another problem: you can only carry one item. Sure you have a taser and your detection tools but you can only bring one other item. I understand that you can't a fireaxe, a shotgun, a sledgehammer, a shovel, a pistol, all at once but Jesus as an FBI Investigator you have a holster and a big ass shoulder bag. At one point I had a pistol with some ammo in it. I found another pistol with some ammo in it. I couldn't combine the ammo. A minor gripe but when ammo is so scarce and you can't go back to get it it's kind of an issue.

Last problem - I am tired of running through dark hallways, dark corridors, dark tunnels, dark condemned buildings, and dark subways. Again, a minor gripe but one that made me put down the game.

All in all pick it up if you're in the mood for a serial killer/FBI Agent/supernatural/running around in the dark game.

A new X-Files movie and Scarlett Johansson.

I was getting a little over saturated with Scarlett Johansson but y'know what she's still hot.

There is going to be a new X-Files movies coming out next July. Mulder and Scully X-Files not the other guy X-Files. Pretty neat though it does seem a little past its prime. We shall see. You may now continue to ogle Scarlett.

Oh yeah, she also has a Tom Waits cover album coming out called Scarlett Sings Tom Waits.

Joss Whedon prepares for heart string tuggin' & more.

Yay! Nerd news!

• Apparently Mr. Whedon is planning another show for the TV. This time it will star Eliza Dushku and be called Dollhouse. The premise of the show is people who have their memories wiped after secret government missions. The secret government lab where the memory wiping is performed is known as "The Dollhouse". I'm sure it will be cooler than I am describing it.


• Kane & Lynch is being released a week early - November 14th. Oh Hells yeah. I know what I'm gonna do on my Thanksgiving vacation.


• Uh. Some Canadians want to make a Hell's Kitchen game. Well...huh...I guess there might be a market for that...maybe I guess...


• I had forgotten that William Dietz wrote a Hitman novel and yes I want to read it but not badly enough to spend $7 on it. I miss the days where I could just strip the covers off mass markets.

And that's currently it for now.