National Lampoon Presents: The Beach Party at the Threshold of Hell (2008)

Don't bother. It's not even remotely as good as Six-String Samurai. Beach Party etc etc is like one of those independent movies you have to watch because someone you know was in it with a budget.

I'm not sure how National Lampoon got involved as distributor. The DVD cover has pretty much nothing to do with the movie. Actually I'm sitting here looking at the cover of the DVD and it looks like it could be pretty cool. It's not.

Brideshead Revisited...the movie?

Evelyn Waugh's Brideshead Revisited is one of my favorite books - Top 100. I am a fan of the BBC miniseries with Jeremy Irons. I really don't know if I could possibly enjoy the movie. There's simply too much going on in the book. Bah I say. Bah.

Battlefield: Bad Company

Whatever your feelings are about EA Games they do make some polished quality games.
Battlefield: Bad Company is no exception. I've really been enjoying the online mode even though there aren't too many options for missions - i.e. Deathmatch, Conquest, etc. - but this doesn't bother me too much because more often than not I end up playing Team Deathmatch anyway.

How does B:BC compare with Call of Duty 4 and Rainbow Six Vegas 2? As far as story goes B:BC has the most enjoyable storyline. It's more along the lines of Kelly's Heroes than a Tom Clancy potboiler or other modern military mumbo "evil dictator has a nuke" jumbo. It's fun and I found myself laughing more often than I do during comedies. One of favorite lines so far has been,

Sweetwater: But that place is heavily guarded.
Haggard: Well we're heavily armed!

B:BC doesn't take its self too seriously and that allowed me to have fun even at a higher difficulty level. Playing isn't punishment or profanity inducing - okay it induces profanity but it's more along the lines of, "FUCK YEAH!" than "FUCK YOU!" Part of the fun is that things blow up real good. I've developed the habit of blasting holes in walls instead of using doors. Hey, it works. I've also learned the joy of ferreting out snipers by reducing cover to bits with a well placed mortar attack.

Game control is standard FPS controls. There's not much in the way of a cover system a la RS: Vegas but you don't really need one. COD4 needed that because the game was punishing.

I'm not saying B:BC is the end all be all for FPS but for a summer diversion it definitely fits the bill. Whatever problems I could have with B:BC can be remedied by playing the other FPS out there.

Fallout 3 - 10/07/08

From the makers of Elder Scrolls: Obilvion a post apocalyptic RPG. OMG doesn't even become to cover it. Fallout 3 this Fall. Boo-yah.

Minute Maid Cherry Limeade is not made of people.

Minute Maid Cherry Limeade is crack. While I haven't begun to steal TVs, mug old ladies, or sell myself for a carton I am not ruling out the possibility.

I picked up two cartons from Kroger's this afternoon. They were on sale 10 cartons for $10 but Amanda would only let me get two. Earlier I was cutting the stuff with iced tea but now I've moved to the straight stuff.

You have to keep in mind that I am still relatively new to sobriety and limeade(s). Previously lime was something you put in something clear, refreshing, and alcoholic or on food. The one real bitch about sobriety - besides me - is the fact that I am always thirsty. Water gets pretty boring pretty fast. Iced tea is good if strong enough. Iced coffee...well I get a little jittery after the second pot of coffee. There's just something about limeade and Cherry Limeade in particular that just hits the spot. Kind of like Pink Grapefruit, kind of like Limeade, kind of like crack. All magic.

When there's no more room in Hell...

wear the dead as jewelry!

I saw this ad on the side of imdb and had to click on it. My morbid curiousity would not be ignored.

Yes folks. LifeGem creates gems out of your loved one's bones! LifeGem is made of people! Pets too - if that's your preference.

Maybe I am just overly sensitive but this is pretty creepy. Not as creepy as wearing a lady suit and slow dancing to "I Only Have Eyes For You" but still. This is morbid, weird, and just vaguely ghoulish. They range in price from only $3500 to a mere $20,000. At least turning people into meat pies yields an affordable - and tasty -product.

Momento Mori are one thing but turning people into bling? This is one gem that is truly outrageous.

Batman: Gotham Knight (2008)

Batman: Gotham Knight could have been a "Can't wait to see the new Batman movie! Need Bat-fix!" but it most certainly wasn't. I downloaded it because I was bored and it's usually a safe bet that some thing animated from the DC Universe will be pretty solid.

B: GK is made up six different shorts by six different animation crews. Amanda quipped that it's kind of like a Batman Animatrix. She's not wrong. Several of the animators worked on that as well. It also has some similar themes, etc., etc. I think The Animatrix kicked ass and B: GK does as well. It always makes me happy to watch worthwhile and self contained animation/anime.

I'm going to pick this up if I see it for a reasonable price and would watch it more than once.

The Barbecue House "Oldest Restaurant in Nacogdoches since 1959"

I figure since we live here now I had better do some restaurant reviews/impressions/whatever. First out of the gate is The Barbecue House. The sign says "BBQ House" so I don't know what the hell that is about.

Maybe it was because we went on an off day but I can't say that I was impressed. The beans were great but maybe it's just me - when I want BBQ I want brisket, sausage, turkey, chicken, and pork. Sure some slaw and some beans or some potato salad so I just don't have a massive pile of meat to feed on.

The brisket was okay, kind of dry, standard brisket. The sausage was pretty unimpressive. The turkey and chicken were good and the sides were pretty damn good. The slaw was a little mayonaisse-y but was a'ight.

They do have sandwiches that may be good. I don't know if they are any good and if I'll be back to try them.

About the sauce. There's much debate about sauce in BBQ: Sauce? No Sauce? Sweet? Vinegar? Thick? Thin? Slathered? Dry? Spicy? Smoky? The Barbecue House has pretty weak sauce. It's sort watery and doesn't have any particular goodness to it. It strikes me as a fairly generic flavor. Combined with average - at best - meat you have a real meh experience.

Fortuately there are still several BBQ joints in town to check out.

The Eye (2008) dir. David Moreau

The Eye was one of those movies that I downloaded - legally - because it was a horror movie to watch. I've often wondered why horror fans will watch crap. I think it's because most of the time there's no choice. We just want to watch a horror movie.

The Eye is not terrible. In fact it's actually perfectly reasonable - for a Lion's Gate movie. It's got some scares and it's directed/cinematographed pretty well and Jessica Alba is Jessica Alba.

The only real problems with the movie are with the story and characters. That is if you're paying any attention at all. Parker Posey shows up as Jessica Alba's sister. Whenever Posey shows up in "regular" movies I always have a moment of confusion. I want to yell, "the Christopher Guest movie is that way!"

The Eye isn't really worth watching unless you really need a movie to watch. Jessica Alba looks normal without make-up (but still is awesome) and she pretty much carries the whole movie.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008) dir. Guillermo Del Toro

Hellboy II: The Golden Army is awesome when Del Toro is allowed to go apeshit and do what Del Toro & crew do best - dark fantasy the likes of which Terry Gilliam only dreamed of. The rest of the movie is pretty stupid and funny. I don't mean funny I laughed. You'll either enjoy this or you won't.

I love Del Toro. To me this is just one movie closer to At the Mountains of Madness.

Okay folks - time for feedback.

Since I have some time on my hands I figure it's time for an overhaul of the site. So if you guys would please tell me what you like, what you don't, suggestions for design, ease of use, etc., etc., etc. then that would be dope. I promise to no longer use the term "dope". I reserve the right to use "fresh".

I would also like to know wether or not you guys would like one giant post page or seperate pages for different posts i.e. food/blog/movies.

HYR also has a few new links and gewgaws on the side bars. You can review the site on blogged.com. I also have a handy dandy subscribe button over there on the right - see? there it is! That way you can RSS HYR and get all the FYI you can shake a BFG at.

The banners for the webcomics look like smashed ass. I know. I am working on that...after I drink this cup of coffee and smoke another cigarette.

Thanks for the help. Hope to hear from you.

By the by I am working through emails and assorted correspondance - at a lazy snail's pace - but I hope you are all well and not dwelling in the Hell of the Upsidedown Sinners.

WTF movie news.

Saw today these interesting pieces:

1. Tarantino is actually going to make Inglorious Bastards after all. Part of me is excited but most of me is waiting for Tarantino & the Weinsteins to turn it into a three part movie. P.S. I'm still waiting for a single volume Kill Bill you pricks.
2. Someone still thinks they are going to make any money making an Elfquest movie.
3. A remake of Hellraiser. Huh. Y'know if it was done right it could work. Personally I'm a Hellraiser II fan - I enjoy Hellraiser as well. Now if they decide to remake Hellraiser with hillbillies and shitkickers then I would be very happy. "We'll tear y'all's souls apart! Woo!"

This sums it up pretty neatly.

Thanks to Zach for sending me this article: "Area Man Makes It Through Day"